All Quotes, The Office Quotes

45 Terribly Funny The Office Quotes

The Office is an American mockumentary sitcom television series. It is a story of the everyday work lives of office employees in the Scranton, Pennsylvania branch of the fictional Dunder Mifflin Paper Company. It has many popular characters like Michael Scott, Dwight Schrute, Jim Halpert, Pam Beesly, and more.

Steve Carell, Rainn Wilson, John Krasinski, Jenna Fischer are among the casts of The Office sitcom. The series is consists of 9 seasons. The first season aired on NBC on March 24, 2005. Episodes from The Office were among the first shows available for download from the iTunes Store beginning in December 2005. Americans cumulatively streamed more than 57 billion minutes of “The Office” in 2020.

These are the funniest The Office Quotes from all the seasons brought together. Let us take a look.

That is sort of an oaky afterbirth. Michael Scott
You are as creepy as a real serial killer. For real. Michael Scott
The eyes are the groin of the face. Michael Scott
This is a dream that I’ve had…since lunch…and I’m not giving it up now. Michael Scott
Who is Justice Beaver? Dwight Schrute
I don’t hate it. I just don’t like it at all and it’s terrible. Michael Scott
Why are you the way that you are? Michael Scott
I feel like all my kids grew up, and then they married each other. It’s every parent’s dream. Michael Scott
There’s a lot of beauty in ordinary things. Isn’t that kind of the point? Pam Beesly
Last, and possibly least, you didn’t think we’d forget, That’s what she said! Michael Scott
Sometimes I'll start a sentence and I don't even know where it's going. I just hope I find it along the way. Michael Scott
I talk a lot, so I've learned to just tune myself out. Kelly Kapoor
Oh, it is on, like a prawn who yawns at dawn. Andy Bernard
Should have burned this place down when I had the chance. Michael Scott
Power points are the peacocks of the business world; all show, no meat. Dwight Schrute
I am Beyoncé always. Michael Scott
I don't care what they say about me. I just want to eat. Pam Beesly
I stopped caring a long time ago. Creed Bratton
The doctor said, if I can't find a new way to relate more positively to my surroundings, I'm going to die. I'm going to die. Stanley Hudson
I find the mystery genre disgusting. I hate being titillated. Angela Martin
You only live once? False. You live every day. You only die once. Dwight Schrute
I am running away from my responsibilities and it feels good. Michael Scott
I'm not superstitious, but I am a little stitious. Michael Scott
I understand nothing. Michael Scott
I guess I’ve been working so hard, I forgot what it’s like to be hardly working. Michael Scott
It takes an advanced sense of humor. I don't expect everybody to understand. Michael Scott
I got six numbers. One more would have been a complete telephone number. Kevin Malone
An office is a place where dreams come true. Michael Scott
I am one of the few people who looks hot eating a cupcake. Kelly Kapoor
I don’t want to be married in a tent like a hobo. Angela Martin
If I don't have some cake soon, I might die. Stanley Hudson
I just wanna lie on the beach and eat hot dogs. That's all I've ever wanted. Kevin Malone
I’m an early bird and I’m a night owl so I’m wise and I have worms. Michael Scott
I’m glad Michael’s getting help. He has a lot of issues, and he’s stupid. Phyllis Lapin-Vance
The only problem is whenever I try to make a taco, I get too excited and crush it. Kevin Malon
Sorry I annoyed you with my friendship. Andy Bernard
The Dunder Mifflin stock symbol is D.M.I. Do you know what that stands for? Dummies, Morons, and Idiots. Because that’s what you’d have to be to own it. And as one of those idiots, I believe the board owes me answers. Oscar Martinez
Look, it doesn’t take a genius to know that every organization thrives when it has two leaders. Go ahead, name a country that doesn’t have two presidents; a boat that sets sail without two captains. Where would Catholicism be without the popes? Oscar Martinez
Fool me once, strike one. Fool me twice, strike three. Michael Scott
I love inside jokes. I’d love to be a part of one someday. Michael Scott
I just want to lie on the beach and eat hot dogs. That’s all I’ve ever wanted. Kevin Malone
I normally don’t enjoy making people laugh. Angela Martin
You know what they say about a car wreck, where it’s so awful you can’t look away? The Dundies are like a car wreck that you want to look away from, but you have to stare at it because your boss is making you. Pam Beesley
Do I need to be liked? Absolutely not. I like to be liked. I enjoy being liked. I have to be liked, but it’s not like this compulsive need to be liked, like my need to be praised. Michael Scott
It is not a good time for me to lose my job since I have some pretty big long-term plans in my personal life with Pam that I’d like her parents to be psyched about. So, I am about to do something very bold in this job that I’ve never done before: try. Jim Halpert

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