All Quotes, Witty

35+ Witty Quotes

Witty means combining clever conception and facetious expression. Witty defines Showing or characterized by quick and inventive verbal humour. Witty defines using words in a clever and amusing way. This is a collection of most funny 35+ witty quotes and sayings.


A witty saying proves nothing. - Voltaire
A witty woman is a treasure; a witty beauty is a power. - George Meredith
Better a witty fool than a foolish wit. - William Shakespeare
Anger makes dull men witty, but it keeps them poor. - Francis Bacon
My philosophy towards life is to enjoy it to the fullest and have fun. I am one of those 'laugh-out-loud' kinds. I am quirky, yet witty. - Bipasha Basu
You can pretend to be serious; but you can't pretend to be witty. - Sacha Guitry
People who can't be witty exert themselves to be devout and affectionate. - George Eliot
You can't just be crass without being witty. Angry crass is horrible. - Ali Wong
The literal meaning of life is whatever you're doing that prevents you from killing yourself. - Albert Camus
To be witty is not enough. One must possess sufficient wit to avoid having too much of it. - Andre Maurois
Conquered people tend to be witty. - Saul Bellow
Next to being witty, the best thing is being able to quote another's wit. - Christian Nestell Bovee
Wilde is an invaluable acquaintance. Often, in situations where I am required to appear witty, I simply steal large chunks from his works and attempt to pass them off as my own with minor modifications. - Alexandra Petri
It is easier to be a lover than a husband for the simple reason that it is more difficult to be witty every day than to say pretty things from time to time. - Honore de Balzac
The characters can't be wittier than people are in real life. They have to be character witty. - Dylan Moran
There's no possibility of being witty without a little ill-nature. - Richard Brinsley Sheridan
Never try to be witty with U.S. airport officials. It's always lost on them and you'll find yourself being put back on the plane. - Johnny Vegas
No woman can be handsome by the force of features alone, any more that she can be witty by only the help of speech. - Kin Hubbard
There weren't any funny people in sports or the Spanish club. All the really creative, witty, funny people that made your belly hurt were in the theater program. - Sean Hayes
Now, where does my comedy come from, like, as a human being? Yeah, when I was a kid I was dyslexic and had to go to special-ed every day and felt stupid about that and got very witty to defend myself. - Dax Shepard
There is still a lot to be said for the well-made, witty, clever, three-act comedy. - Terry Teachout
Music can be witty, but it's not funny unless it's conceptually funny. - Alan Menken
Though lust do masque in ne'er so strange disguise she's oft found witty, but is never wise. - John Webster
Witty inspirations are the proverbs of the educated. - Karl Wilhelm Friedrich Schlegel
If someone makes you feel wrong-footed, you're unlikely to find them witty. - Rosamund Pike
Witty, adventurous guys really rev my engine. - Miranda Rae Mayo
There's a real emphasis on being witty in Scotland, even in crime novels. - Denise Mina
A word of kindness is seldom spoken in vain, while witty sayings are as easily lost as the pearls slipping from a broken string. - George Dennison Prentice
Art should be witty, like a good Eddie Murphy movie, to make your life a little easier and better. - William Quigley
Ask me no questions, and I'll tell you no fibs. - Oliver Goldsmith
A technicality I'm prepared to hide wildly behind. - Jim Butcher
Nothing so fortifies a friendship as a belief on the part of one friend that he is superior to the other. - Honore de Balzac
One must have a heart of stone to read the death of little Nell without laughing. - Oscar Wilde
A person is wise if he listens to millions of advice and doesn't implement any of it. - Michael Bassey Johnson
Intelligence is more important than strength, that is why earth is ruled by men and not by animals. - Amit Kalantri
Every habit makes our hand more witty, and out wit more handy. - Friedrich Nietzsche
Don't worry about it; only worry about how people like her breed. - Gasmaskman
Nothing evokes the prurient like puritanism. - Christopher Moore
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